Ash Wednesday came and went. Friday, I got a last-minute audition. I’d set my mind to look for joy. guess it paid off, because I got the job.
I don’t want to be one of those “Hanging with Ryan Gosling, God is good” jerks. If that’s how God is good, then what about the rest of the planet? But I hadn’t worked a lot in the past five years, not as a writer or an actor – even adjunct teaching dried up last fall. A lot of my grieving the past two years has had to do with that: the loss of vocation. I started to look as if I Larry and I were gonna have to move to a trailer in Washington State. But I have had two jobs inside a month, so I feel very fortunate. (We still may have to move to that trailer, some day. Or a tiny house. Or two tiny houses parked next to each other).
There’s an army saying, “Shit rolls downhill.” If the people at the top aren’t happy, no one will be happy. When I stepped into the makeup trailer, they were playing disco and soul. KC and the Sunshine Band’s “That’s the way, uh huh, uh huh, I like it.” Half way through the song, a makeup artist a few stalls down said, “Girl, I see you mouthing along, you better sing it.” So we did. There was a lot of laughter and giggling in the trailer. I had a feeling the people in charge were happy.
And they were. The show creator was friendly, we talked for a bit. At the end of the day, he came back to say goodbye, with a “look forward to seeing you again.”
Yes. It was a huge blessing, especially because the day before I had a debilitating migraine. I’ve got three bulging discs in my neck that trigger migraine syndrome and muscle spasms in my upper body. Fun times. So I was grateful I didn’t have one on the day of work.
Today, I’m fighting another migraine and neck spasms. I guess my next task is to find joy in the midst of shit rolling downhill all over my body and mind. (Thank God for Advil, Excedrin and turmeric.)